Losing Fear of Writing

At this point, I am the equivalent to a broken record when I say “writing is not my strong suit”. I am not sure if it is the act of or the thought process needed that discourages me but I do not like writing. Additionally, I have never been confident or proud of my pieces which was apparent. Teachers would continuously make comments about how my essays were formatted correctly but lacked attention capturing content. Besides their remarks, I would be given a high grade which left me unsatisfied and yearning for improvement. Over this quarter I have learned to write honestly about private topics and to put a halt to my mentality of only writing in essay format. These are two major steps forward to being the writer I want to be.

With “Post-War Zone” and “Why I Care”, a new mindset brought a deeper sense of connection. Until recently, I have never considered how out-of-classroom experiences affected my writing styles.  This has been my first quarter as a freshman in college, in an all new setting, meeting all new people, and having all new experiences. Due to my new living and schooling circumstances, I have been challenging myself to travel beyond my comfort zone in order to become fully immersed. Extending this mindset into my writings has proved to be beneficial. I have allowed myself to write about my most closeted events and feelings openly. By doing so, my attachment to those two specific pieces is stronger than any writings I have done before. With this new found confidence, I feel that I can now be proud of my writings.

            During these past ten weeks, I was able to break the academic writing style that held me back from the general progress I needed. “Concert Anticipation” is the one piece that forced me to think and write in a way I have not done before. I have never had a writing assignment quite like this one. By choosing to write about one of my favorite topics, I thought it would make the writing process trouble-free. My tactic made for some ease but I quickly came to the conclusion that my thought process was wrong. Even with the instructions, I still felt I needed to write well thought out sentences in an organized manner. I began to type anything that came to mind related to concerts. Once I started to just write, I found this piece to be fun which is something I am not used to writing being. With this new found enjoyment, I began to think about different variations of sentences. The limitation of six word sentences contributed to putting an end to the restrictions I had placed on myself.

Fortunately, from these three pieces, I would have difficulty picking which I favor the most. Since I am known for my overbearing modest attitude, I feel deserving to say: “Post-War Zone”, “Concert Anticipation”, and “Why I Care” are three of my best writings so far in my academic career. By throwing away the constraints of essay writing styles and by allowing myself to journey past my comfort levels, I have lost the fear I associated with writing.